ADDICTION ISSUES

Denial

Denial is what makes it so hard for an addict to stop as he does not see that he has a problem. How can you provide help and treatment when the addict sees that there is no problem? Denial is an unconscious defense mechanism, something the addict uses to keep himself going when faced with reality that is too painful to accept.

There are other forms of defenses besides denial. These are some common defenses used by gaming addicts.

Rationalizing - I go to school every day, I don't have a problem.
Minimizing - My friends spend a longer time playing than me.
Justifying - What is so wrong about playing games? Is there anything wrong when adults watch TV?
Projecting - I don’t have a problem. You are the one having a problem
Blaming - It’s your fault for stopping me half way. Now I have to finish this level.
Intellectualizing - Research shows that only a small number who cannot control their time. I can.
Lying - I was not playing. I am doing my project work
Manipulation - If you stop nagging at me, I will when I finish.
Threatening - If I cannot play now, I cannot concentrate on finishing my homework
Explaining - After I finish this game I will feel better and not so sleepy
Analyzing - Playing games help me make friends and learn to work with others in a team.
Arguing - I'm not addicted to the computer. I will stop when the game is over
Defiance - Don’t you dare to stop me now or my character gets killed.
Withdrawing - If I don't do or say anything, they will leave me alone.
Shouting - Leave me alone, I don't want to talk about it!
Silence -
Smiling - Just laugh it off. Nervous smile.
Compliance - I just do and say what they want.

Families are also often in denial. It occurs when parents do not recognize or admit that gaming is negatively affecting their child in his usual activities. Blame is placed on the child’s lack of motivation, his laziness, influence from friends or lack of support from teachers. It also occurs when one parent sees the problem but the other does not. An example would be when one parent tries to set limits on gaming time but the other parent interferes and says that children should not be controlled too tightly and that the child needs to have his own time to do the things he likes. This allows the addict to continue in his behaviour until the problem affects the parents or there is a crisis before help is sought.

When in denial, parents also enable the addict to continue in his behaviour. This occurs because gaming is not seen as a problem and is therefore allowed to continue. The negative effects of gaming is minimized when it is reasoned that other children also play computer games. Parents also begin to have faulty thinking that if gaming is controlled, it reduces the child’s motivation to study or that the child needs his games as a way to deal with stress.

Even when the addiction becomes more severe, the denial may become stronger. This sometimes occur when facing the truth of addiction is painful for the parents. Denial stops when the truth becomes too obvious or a crisis has occurred. However, I have come across cases where in spite of the fact that the child has been skipping school to play games, parents continue to deny the addiction. Denial will continue when parents have something or someone to blame.

To understand more about denial here are some useful articles

1. This page covers the following contents
What is denial?
How does denial look to others?
How can we confront denial in ourselves?
How can we cope with denial in others?
A denial intervention model

http://www.livestrong.com/article/14731-dealing-with-denial/

2. Understanding the 3 stages of denial and how to overcome it

http://www.azureacres.com/addiction-recovery/denial.asp

3. How to help someone with denial
http://www.allpositiveoptions.com/Dealingwithdenial.htm

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Internet Addiction Resource

ADDICTION ISSUES

Denial